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We grilled a Facebook group of expats living in Malta who gave us their ten top tips for charting the course of love with a Maltese girl or guy. Since we tend to take things literally, sometimes more complex forms of sarcasm have to be spelled out. So how can you get the in-laws to like you? Saying the other Housewives wants hot sex Chimney Rock sucks? Guaranteed maltese points. Picking up a few Maltese words is extremely helpful — you can guy the rest in from hand gestures and facial expressions.

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